During this year, let's be careful to keep this thought in mind:
Things are to be used, but People are to be loved ...
Be yourself......This is the only day we HAVE. Have a nice day and Best regards

Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character..Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

The four treasures of food that shouldn't be wasted when eating.

1)Fish Eyes- Fish eyes, especially mackerel family, contains rich quantity of DHA and EPA which are very rare unsaturated fatty acid. The most beneficial property of these natural substances is their ability to stimulate human brain cells, improve memory and thinking power, and also very helpful in preventing memory decline, high cholesterol and hypertension diseases.. The common notion suggested is that eating certain animal parts would strengthen similar body parts of ours, and this has been proven correct by clinical experiments where fish eyes are concerned: they can help to reduce the deterioration of eyesight.

2) Fibres of orange or grapefruit peels- When eating oranges or grapefruits, after removing the peel, do not remove all the fibres that cover the fruits. In fact, the fibres contained a vitamin which helps to maintain the elasticity and density of the artery wall, which in turn reduces the danger of bleeding especially in the fine arteries. Hypertension patients usually have problem of brain haemorrage while diabetic patients have retina haemorrage. For people with tendency to bleed, especially old people with tendency of artery hardening, eating fibres of oranges and grapefruit peels is particularly helpful.

3) Bones- The nutritional value of bones are higher than that of the meat. Comparing the nutritional values of Pork bones and pork, the bones contain far more protein, iron, sodium and calories than meat. Bones contain 23% more protein than milk powder, 61% more than beef, three times as much as pork and more than double that of eggs. It has abundance of essential minerals that humans require, like vitamins A, B1 and B2 that are useful for slowing aging. The best part is, when boiled in soup, these nutritions become more readily absorbed by human body than plant-based food.

4) chili leaves- Chili leaves contains complete range of amino acid almost 4 times compared to the chili fruits. It also contains more than double what chili fruits have of which are anti-cancerous substance. On top of that, chili leaves are rich in calcium, beta carotene, various vitamins and other nutrients. Eating a suitable quantity of chili leaves enhances secretion of digestive juices, improves appetite and are good for indigestions, gastric and stomach discomfort. Regular intake of chili leaves also help in warming body, strengthen liver, improve eyesight, reduce weight and improve beauty. Chili leaves is tasty and can either be cooked alone, frying with meat or making soup.

Lim Peh be zai ai sia hamik ho..lim pe blog all black n white,that's what blogspot ho lim pe..black and white..blogspot thought that lim peh staying years back..lim peh be song blogspot..

Little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.

The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, 'When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah' .

The teacher asked, 'What if Jonah went to hell?'

The little girl replied, 'Then you ask him'.
**********************************************************************************

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.

'Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'Th at's Michael, He's a doctor.'

A small voice at the back of the room rang out, 'And there's the teacher, she's dead...
**********************************************************************************

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:

'Take only ONE. God is watching.'

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.

A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples...
**********************************************************************************

I wonder why I cant upload any video or pics on my blog...my blog is going crazy..only black and white..

HANDBOOK 2009


Health:

1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Make time for prayer.
6. Play more games.
7. Read more books than you did in 2008.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day And while you walk, smile.


Personality:

11. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what
their journey is all about.
12. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control.
Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don't over do. Keep your limits.
14. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
15. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her
mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more.
24. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:

25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your
family and friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:

32. Do the right thing!
33. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
34. GOD heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come.
38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
39. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

A HUSBAND COMES HOME FROM A RELIGIOUS MEETING;

HE GREETS HIS WIFE AND LIFTS HER UP. HE THEN CARRIED HER AROUND THE HOUSE.

THE WIFE WAS SO SURPRISED AND SHE ASKED
'DID THE PREACHER PREACH ABOUT BEING ROMANTIC'?

THE HUSBAND SAID, 'NO, HE SAID WE MUST CARRY OUR BURDENS AND SORROWS'.

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor.

Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.

Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups - porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said:

"If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones.

While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.

Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee.

In most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink.

What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups...

And then you began eyeing each other's cups.

Now consider this: Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life,
and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of Life we live.

Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee God has provided us."

God brews the coffee, not the cups........ .. Enjoy your coffee!

"The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything."

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

Firstly, I finish off my global marketing assign,but left little parts to do which I am not sure whether able to finish it by tonight and show to Mr Hong my assign. And above all, I miss lady Dianna very much. And finally I deleted her (not my lady D) off my FB..not worth having her name in my list..and Jack Tan Chun Sian is the person that I got the most friends in common, 120 friends in common. Only met him at college last 2 years, now both of us have the most friends in common,more than any of my friends whom I knew ages ago.

Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right. Forget about the one who don't. Believe everything happens for a reason.. if you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life,let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it. Friends are like balloons, once you let them go, you can't get them back. So I am going to tie you to my heart so I never lose you.

my partner YongKian and DSA staff Mr. Lee

Eventual Mens double champion-YunLeong&KahWai

Nilai University College Badminton Tournament

Last night my college just concluded badminton tournament,and it's my 3rd and final time I able to join this college tournament.I will be graduating soon,all these pictures will be my memories.Nevertheless,I got 3rd for men's double, and champion for mixed double.

11 Ways Jesus Speaks into Your Sorrow

“I, too, have known overwhelming sorrow.” Jesus understands the crushing weight and agonizing loneliness of grief. He has something valuable to teach you as you struggle with sorrow – something you couldn’t learn without going through it. Jesus promises to walk with you every step of the way through your sorrow, giving you the comfort and companionship you need.

“I, too, have heard God tell me ‘no.’ Jesus shows you what to do when God doesn’t give you what you want. Even though Jesus was God’s Son, God still said “no” to His passionate prayer to avoid dying on the cross. Ultimately, after wrestling with God’s plan for His life, Jesus submitted to it because of His confidence in God’s purposes – even when they conflicted with His own desires. When you recognize that God always chooses what’s best – that when he answers “no” to your prayers, He isn’t cruelly punishing you but is actually acting in love toward you – you can entrust your life to His plans without fear or resentment. Your suffering isn’t wasted pain; it’s a powerful tool to help you learn the value of obeying God.

“I am willing to heal your deadliest disease.” Jesus knows what you need most of all. It isn’t physical healing; it’s spiritual healing. Whether or not Jesus chooses to heal a disease in your body, you’ll eventually die anyway. But if you’re afflicted by a disease in your soul – sin – you’re suffering will be eternal if you don’t invite Jesus to heal you. Fortunately, Jesus is willing to take the sickness of your sin upon Himself and transfer to you the healthy state of righteousness before God. Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross offers you something much greater than healing from diseases that can destroy your temporary body. It offers you the greatest healing possible: healing from the sin that can destroy your eternal soul.

“I will save you from yourself.” Jesus saves you from a wasted life of always trying to get your own way. Instead of being tyrannized by what you want and chasing after it constantly, you’ll be free to pursue what will ultimately give you the most fulfillment – God’s purposes for your life. Ironically, when you try to save your life, you end up losing it in pursuits that don’t really matter. But if you let go of your own agendas, God’s kingdom can advance through your life and make the world a better place. Leave a life of comfort behind and follow Jesus into a life of significance.

“I will keep you safe.” Jesus protects you from eternal harm. Your eternal soul has much more value than the temporary life of your earthly body. While Jesus hasn’t promised to protect your physical safety, He has promised to protect your soul for eternity. While Jesus won’t necessarily protect your plans for your life, He will protect God’s purposes for you to make sure that you experience the very best when you trust Him.

“I have a purpose in your pain.” Jesus gives you insight when you ask, “Why?” Don’t get stuck trying to figure out the cause of your suffering; that may not be revealed to you in this life. But you can discover the good purpose that will give your loss meaning and show others who are watching you how faith can make a positive difference in their own lives.

“I will give you a heart for forgiveness.” Jesus empowers you to forgive people who don’t deserve it. If you’ve received God’s forgiveness for your own sin, you need to forgive your fellow sinners. You can count on Jesus to help you through the forgiveness process, giving you the strength to take each step, no matter how deeply people have hurt or offended you. Rather than focusing on how people don’t deserve your forgiveness, focus on following God’s command to forgive to free yourself from bitterness that poisons your soul. Trust God to bring about justice in each situation, as He has promised to do at the right time and in the right way.

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“I am enough for you.” Jesus provides what you need when you need it. Emptiness isn’t necessarily bad; it’s good when it motivates you to come to Jesus to be filled. When you pray again and again for relief from the pain in your life that doesn’t come, Jesus promises that His presence and the strength He’ll give you will be enough. Even when Jesus chooses not to take your pain away, He will give you the grace to endure it. Move from desperately seeking relief from your pain to seeking to grow as a person and glorify God in the midst of it.

“I am giving life to those who believe in Me.” Jesus asks you to believe that death is not the end of life. Depend on Jesus as your source of life both now and forever. Trust Him with your life in this world and in eternity after you leave this world. When you grieve the death of someone you have loved, remind yourself of Jesus’ promises about heaven and look forward with joyful anticipation to the day that you’ll be able to see that person again.

“I am in control of your life and your death.” Jesus soothes your fear of death. He is in control of the beginning of your life, the end, and every day in between. You don’t need to be afraid of your future, because it’s in God’s loving hands – and there’s no better place for it to be. Trust God’s timing for your life on earth and make the most of each day that He gives you.

“I will give you rest.” Jesus opens His arms to you. He invites you to give Him the burden of sorrow that you’ve been carrying on your own. As you connect yourself to Jesus, He will do the heavy lifting in your sorrowful experiences so you can find the rest you need. Rely on Jesus’ strength flowing through you to help you deal with anything that comes your way.

To strengthen unions, marriage experts advise couples to "make weekly dates" or "go away on a couple's weekend." Those are great ideas, but let's be realistic: how often can busy couples expect to drop everything and get away? These 11 quick and simple ways to express love let busy couples rekindle romance among the chaos of everyday life.

1. Embrace your past. Assemble a scrapbook together, pull out your wedding video, or write your own personal romance story. Reliving special memories together is a great way to strengthen your bond.

2. Be kids together. Have a pillow fight, challenge each other to a game of hopscotch, or cuddle on the couch and laugh as you watch cartoons.

3. Wrap your mate in love. While your sweetie showers, sneak his towel into the dryer, and as he steps out, wrap him in fluffy warmth. Or use the same idea to warm her feet when she snuggles in bed on a chilly autumn night.

4. Speak the languages of love. Surprise your "amante" (Italian for "lover") with some international sweet talk. Access an exhaustive list of ways to say "I love you" in different languages.

5. Write love notes to each other. Spell it out in his oatmeal with raisins, on her dashboard with yarn, or use lipstick on your bathroom mirror. Compose your own poem, borrow a verse from Song of Songs, or just write "I love you."

6. Turn on the charm. Who says you have to stop flirting once you're married? At your next party, wink at him across a crowded room, or slip your arm around her as you make social small talk. That personal connection amid the crowd is like saying, "This is great, but I'd rather be with you!"

7. Connect online. E-mail your spouse throughout the day, just to say you're thinking of him.

8. Remember the little things. When you step in to help with the day-to-day "drudge" chores—making dinner, bathing the kids—your spouse knows she's appreciated and loved. And completing a chore for your sweetie frees more time and energy for the two of you to enjoy other activities together.

9. Send it snail mail. Take time to write an encouraging note, slap a stamp on it, and mail it. Your spouse will love the surprise—especially since it won't be a credit card bill or junk mail!

10. Celebrate everything. Most couples celebrate the anniversary of their marriage or first date, but how about the anniversary of your engagement, or first kiss? (If you don't remember, make it up!) There have been all kinds of milestones throughout your relationship, so mark each one with flowers, a card, or a romantic interlude.

11. Just say it. Your spouse needs to hear those three simple words daily. Whisper it, sing it, shout it. Say it.

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A story by a girl.

"When I was a little girl, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work. On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage, and extremely burned toast in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his toast, smile at my mom, and ask me how my day was at school. I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember Watching him smear butter and jelly on that toast and eat every bite!

When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the toast. And I'll never forget what he said: 'Baby, I love burned toast.'

Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his toast burned. He wrapped me in his arms and said, 'Debbie, your Momma put in a hard day at work today and she's real tired. And besides-a little burnt toast never hurt anyone!' You know, life is full of imperfect things.....and imperfect people. I'm not the best housekeeper or cook.

What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each other's faults - and choosing to celebrate each other's differences - is the one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship.

And that's my prayer for you today. That you will learn to take the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of your life and lay them at the feet of GOD. Because in the end, He's the only One who will be able to give you a relationship where burnt toast isn't a deal-breaker! We could extend this to any relationship in fact - as understanding is the base of any relationship, be it a husband-wife or parent-child or friendship!! "

"Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket but into your own." See through God's eyes and feel through God's heart And you will appreciate the value of every soul including yourself.

Maybe. . we were supposed to meet the
wrong people before meeting the right
one so that, when we finally meet the
right person, we will know how to be
grateful for that gift.

Maybe . . . it is true that we don't
know what we have until we lose it,
but it is also true that we don't know
what we have been missing until it
arrives.

Maybe . . . the brightest future will
always be based on a forgotten past;
after all, you can't go on
successfully in life until you let go
of your past mistakes, failures and
heartaches.

Maybe . . you should hope for enough
happiness to make you sweet, enough
trials to make you strong, enough
sorrow to keep you human, and enough
hope to make you happy.

Maybe . . . the happiest of people
don't necessarily have the best of
everything; they just make the most of
everything that comes along their way.

Maybe . . . the best kind of friend is
the kind you can sit on a porch and
swing with, never say a word, and then
walk away feeling like it was the best
conversation you've ever had.

Maybe . . . happiness waits for all
those who cry, all those who hurt, all
those who have searched, and all those
who have tried, for only they can
appreciate the importance of all the
people who have touched their lives.

May be . . you should do something nice
for someone every single day, even if
it is simply to leave them alone.

Maybe . . . there are moments in life
when you miss someone -- a parent, a
spouse, a friend, a child -- so much
that you just want to pick them from
your dreams and hug them for real, so
that once they are around you
appreciate them more.

Maybe … giving someone all your love
is never an assurance that they will
love you back. Don't expect love in
return; just wait for it to grow in
their heart; but, if it doesn't, be
content that it grew in yours.

Maybe .. . . you should dream what you

want to dream; go where you want to

go, be what you want to be, because

you have only one life and one chance
to do all the things you dream of, and want to do.

Sadness empowers over me currently when I thought of her going for practical back at Sabah..only 2 months together then have to be apart for 3 months, surely not a good news for me..I MISS HER..MISS HER..I MISS HERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.........I am going to start working early september, without her by my side definitely not my choice,need her to support me emotionally..just misss her so much..very much..

Autumm in Germany

Salzburg Austria

Windmills in Holland

Disney Castle

Edge of Glacier

Lavender Farm

Night scene of Eiffel Tower

If this is on earth, What is heaven like?

I am officially on tension,pressured,anger mode over my GM assignment..

Stupid Global Marketing assignments....

THIS SO SO MUCH BETTER...

Right Words, Wrong Heart

Today he's a respected Christian professional in our community. But legend has it that he had a strong streak of mischief in him when he was a boy, and maybe even now. An older friend from their church told me that when this man was four, his pastor came up to him at a football game and sat down next to him. And the pastor said, "Well, Mark, what have you been doing with yourself lately?" To which Mark replied with a smile, "Would you believe praying?" To which his pastor replied, "No, Mark, I wouldn't believe it." Smart pastor.

It doesn't take long to learn the right church answers, does it? Man, we know what to say. A four-year-old boy can do it! And many of us have been around a lot longer than that and we know the words to say. The danger is that you can really fool yourself spiritually, just because you know all the right words, and go to all the right meetings, and do all the right things. Tragically, a full Christian vocabulary can mask a dangerously empty heart.

Jesus talked about that in our word for today from the Word of God in Mark 7:6. He said of some deeply religious people, "These people honor Me with their lips, but their hearts are far from Me." And you can be sure that getting into heaven will be based on what is in your heart, not on your lips. Your eternal rewards from Jesus will be also be based on what's in your heart, not your lips. Remember, "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart" (1 Samuel 16:7).

Recently, we called some Native American Christian friends of ours whose daughter has been struggling with some serious moral issues and life issues. The daughter was willing to talk with my wife, but only in her mother's words, "after she puts her coat on." Now that expression was new to us. Our friend explained that Indians use that expression sometimes to describe saying what non-Indians want to hear. In other words, saying what you think the other person wants to hear.

Well a lot of church folks "put their coat on" regularly when they're in a Christian setting. After all, you can pretty much learn the vocabulary of Christianity in about a month, and that will be enough to get you through with most Christians for the rest of your life. It's not enough to get you through with God.

It's wise to stand back every once in a while and ask, "How much of my Christianity is really about Christ and how much is a mask, a role I'm playing, human expectations I'm trying to fulfill; just my church?" If there's been more than one you, the Christian you and then the other guys, maybe you're tired of playing charades spiritually, you're tired of the performance, you're tired of the mask. It's time to say, "Jesus, I've been saying all the right words, but You know how hollow it all is really and now so do I. I just want to love You and want to know You for real. I want this to be all about a Christ-relationship, not the Christian religion."

And if you've never really given yourself to Jesus, let this be the day that you move from playing a role to the reality of knowing this awesome Savior. Listen, if you're ready to begin this relationship for real, would you tell Him that? That's the important thing. And say, "Dear Jesus, I believe when You died on that cross, some of those sins you died for were mine. You have paid my death penalty. You walked out of your grave under your own power. You are alive. You can give me eternal life and I turn from the running of my own life, and I place the rest of my life completely in Your hands.

At that moment you go from the role to the reality. At that moment, you don't just know about Jesus, you know Him. At that moment, you're not just believing things about Jesus; you belong to Him.

The words that really matter aren't the ones you say to men about Jesus; they're the ones you say to Jesus about being really His.

Masturbation is the experience of sexual orgasm produced by self-stimulation. Virtually every man and almost as many women have tried it. It is a regular practice of most single men.

One of the major forces preventing young people from obeying the call of God into vocational Christian service is defeat in the area of lust. A teenager hears a challenging call to throw himself into the cause of world evangelization. He feels the promptings of the Holy Spirit. He tastes the thrill of following the King of kings into battle. But he does not obey because he is masturbating regularly. He feels guilty. He can hardly imagine witnessing to a pretty girl about the eternal plight of her soul, because he has so habitually looked at girls naked in his imagination. So he feels unworthy and unable to obey the call of God. Masturbation becomes the enemy of missions.

Is masturbation wrong? Let me address the issue mainly for men. I cannot imagine sexual orgasm in the loins without sexual image in the mind. I know there are nocturnal emissions, which I regard as innocent and helpful, but I doubt that they are ever orgasmic apart from a sexual dream that supplies the necessary image in the mind. Evidently God has constituted the connection between sexual orgasm and sexual thought in such a way that the force and pleasure of orgasm is dependent on the thought or images in our minds.

Therefore in order to masturbate, it is necessary to get vivid and exciting thoughts or images into the mind. This can be done by pure imagination or by pictures or movies or stories or real persons. These images always involve women as sexual objects. I use the word “object” because in order for a women to be a true sexual “subject” in our imagination she must in reality be one with whom we are experiencing what we are imagining. This is not the case with masturbation.

So I vote no on masturbation. There may be other reasons why it is wrong. For now I rest my vote on the inevitable sexual images which accompany masturbation and which turn women into sexual objects. The sexual thoughts that enable masturbation do not help any man to treat women with greater respect. Therefore masturbation produces real and legitimate guilt and stands in the way of obedience.

Three encouragements to single men:

1. You are not alone in the battle.
2. Periodic failure in this area no more disqualifies you from ministry than periodic failures of impatience (which is also a sin).
3. Pursue the expulsive power of a new affection. I walked by a whole section of “photography” books at the Walker Art Center last Thursday empowered by the better pleasure of feeling Christ conquer the temptation to look.

By John Piper

Sometimes life seems hard to bear,

Full of sorrow, trouble and woe

It's then I have to remember

That it's in the valleys I grow

If I always stayed on the mountain top

And never experienced pain,

I would never appreciate God's love

And would be living in vain.

I have so much to learn

And my growth is very slow,

Sometimes I need the mountain tops,

But it's in the valleys I grow.

I do not always understand

Why things happen as they do,

But I am very sure of one thing.

My Lord will see me through.

My little valleys are nothing

When I picture Christ on the cross

He went through the valley of death;

His victory was Satan's loss.

Forgive me Lord, for complaining

When I'm feeling so very low.

Just give me a gentle reminder

That it's in the valleys I grow.

Continue to strengthen me, Lord

And use my life each day

To share your love with others

And help them find their way.

Thank you for valleys, Lord

For this one thing I know

The mountain tops are glorious

But it's in the valleys I grow!

Record I

Patient A: "So how.. this book not bad ya?"

Patient B: "Excellent! Astounding work. No nonsense shit, sharp and
concise to the point. But there's a major flaw in this piece of art
too many character names to remember!!!"

Nurse: "Hey! Can the two of you..put the telephone book back to the
original place?"


Record II

One doctor asked a patient: "If I were to cut one of your ear off,
what will happen to you?"

Patient: "Then I will not be able to hear..."

Doctor: "Hmm.. that's normal...So if I were to cut your other ear
off, what will happen to you?"

Patient: "Then I will not be able to see..."

The doctor became nervous and asked: "Why would you not see then???"

Patient: "Because my spectacles will drop down. .."


Record III

IMH has an old lady who wears black everyday, carries a black
umbrella and squats @ the entrance to the IMH everyday without
fail, rain or shine.

The doctor wanted to administer treatment for her and decided to
start by understanding her behaviour.

So, the doctor also wear black and carries a black umbrella; squatted
outside together just next to her, rain or shine, everyday without
fail.

So...days goes by...the two of them squatted side-by-side w/o a
single exchange of words..for one solid month...

One fine day..the old lady finally broke the silence and asked the
doctor: "Err...Excuse me! Are you also a mushroom?"


Record IV (the best)

A nurse saw a patient writing a letter.. She got curious and went to
take a peek.. But the patient didn't wanna let her see.

Nurse (unable to contain her curiosity): "Who are you writing to?"

Patient : "I'm writing a letter to myself..."

Her curiosity grew and she thought to herself (Why would someone
write a letter to himself?)

So she asked again: "So...what's written inside?"

Patient (got impatient): "You crazy ah? I haven't receive the letter,
how would I know??"


Record V

Two patients escape from the IMH. They climbed up a tree and one of
them fell from the tree and started rolling on the ground.

After a while, the patient rolling shouted to the top: "Hey! How come
you are not coming down yet?"

The patient ontop replied: "No..no...I can't...I'm not ripe yet"


Record VI

One patient visited the doctor: "Doc...how? I think I'm a chicken
since I was born..."

Doctor: "Woah! that's very serious...Why do you only come and seek
treatment now?"

Patient: "Because my family needs me to hatch the eggs..."


Record VII (Perfect)

One truck driver was doing his usual delivery to IMH.
He discovered a flat tyre when he was about to go home after
unloading the stuff.

He jacked up the truck and took the flat tyre down.
When he was about to fix on the new tyre, he accidentally dropped all
the bolts into the drain.

The truck driver was very sad as he can't fished the bolts up;
started to panic.

Coincidentally, one patient walk past and asked the driver what
happened.

The driver thought to himself, since there's nothing much he can do,
he told the patient the whole incident.

The patient nonchantly replied: "can't even fix such a simple
problem...no wonder you are destined to be a truck driver..."

he goes on explaining:

"You just have to take one bolt each from the other 3 tyres and fix
it onto this tyre. Drive to the nearest workshop and replace the
missing ones"

The driver was very impressed and asked "You're so smart but why do
you stay in IMH?"

Patient replied: "I stay here because I'm crazy not STUPID!"

Exactly 3 years I been staying at Nilai College..tons of ups and down happened, and I am glad I am given a chance to study..proud of myself able to finish degree although it seems nothing..thank you papa,mummy,3 yi for their encouragement and advices..and my friends whom I cherished and loved throughout this 3 years..after Sept 11,I am officially graduating from degree in Marketing Management..

If lim-pe grandma look like this...